Will the sedition coalition return Jan. 20? | Mann Overboard

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One week to go until The Orange Peril is gone. 

Thank God. That is, unless a new superspreader attempted coup has occurred. 

The knucklewalker rioters kinda harshed my high last week. I had barely had the chance to savor The Turtle’s being dislodged from his Senate post when all hell broke loose. One hopes the drooling idiots won’t be back on Inauguration Day next week.

National radio host Thom Hartmann calls these overwhelmingly white insurgents “Trump’s cult of personality.” This reminded me of a classic, clever definition of cults: “Unglued adherents.” 

— MSNBC’s Lawrence O’Donnell slyly refers to Ted Cruz and his Congressional co-enablers as “the sedition coalition.” 

Port Ludlow resident Tony Brenna is a Brit who was a longtime Fleet Street tabloid reporter. He was once abducted by Idi Amin’s goon squad and almost ended up being shot and dumped in the forest. (He was dumped, but unshot.) His Facebook feed is a nonstop reel of diatribes directed at Donald of Orange. Tony called last week’s rampage in D.C. a “march of morons,” and  “unwashed yahoos” before calling for Cadet Bonespurs’ imprisonment. 

I often experience PT people who shake their heads seeing these people. They don’t understand their bigoted behavior because they either haven’t known — or haven’t lived around — what Brenna calls “stupid domestic terrorists.” 

Unfortunately, I have lived amidst the white-power crowd. 

My Dad was a career Army officer who was, regrettably, assigned to a base in Oklahoma. 

My Okie classmates took pride in the fact that we were the largest segregated high school in the Sooner State. They once invited me to ride along with them down to the predominantly African-American section of Oklahoma City and smash black people’s heads with baseball bats. Thanks, but no thanks, Gomer. 

I was on our high school tennis team at this football-crazed school. More than once, I heard it called a sport “only fags play,” hint, hint. 

Many of you may not believe this story — like many I’ve known: 

On Nov. 22, 1963, I was sitting in my high school English class. The terrible announcement came on the P.A. that President Kennedy had been murdered not far away, down in Dallas.

Half the class stood up and cheered. “That damn (N-word) lover got what he deserved,” several said. 

See, I knew most of you wouldn’t believe it. 

Seeing those mostly white idiots storming the Capitol last week was a lot like seeing my high school classmates again. (Timely disclaimer: of course, not all Oklahomans are bigots.) 

Like I said, I’ve lived amidst such people. And there are many more racists in this country than you may realize. 

I was thrilled when Dad was transferred out of Oklahoma. 

— Hey, Rocky, Watch Me Pull a Rabbit Outta My Hat: Our neighbors swear there are flying squirrels here in PT. They say they’ve seen them. Have you? 

— 1-B wannabe: I dodged the over-75 bullet with Gov. Inslee’s prioritizing those of us over 70 — not the CDC’s suggested over 75 — to get the vaccine. (I’m 74 next week.) Jefferson Healthcare exec Mike Glenn recently joked to me that “hospital CEOs will be near the back of the line.” I hope not. 

— Seeing those MAGA morons storming the Capitol last week reminded me of San Francisco comic Mike Dugan’s line: “If this is the Master Race,” he says, “I’d hate to see the qualifying heats.” 

(PT humorist/erstwhile Oklahoma resident Bill Mann is Newsmann9@gmail.com.)