Carole Marshall

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It began as a simple search for an old article I’d written a few years ago. There was a particular paragraph I wanted to use in a column I was considering. I dragged out the large bin containing most of my published work. Every piece was in order by publication and date, so finding the article wouldn’t be much of a chore. What I didn’t count on was a glitch in my plan.

I’d forgotten about the very first file in the bin. That folder contained comments from various professors I’d had over the years as well as a few favorite-author quotes. Those comments and quotes continue to greatly influence my writing career, so much so that I ditched looking for the old article and stayed with that first file.

Reading the fondly remembered notes that have set the pace for my writing style and direction for 30 years inspired me to write a different column with information worth passing along. The most impactful words came from a much-respected creative nonfiction writing professor.

“You have a very strong ability to translate human emotion into the written word, without being maudlin, sappy, superficial or trite.” My professor went on to say, “Writing is what you should be doing.” I share this not to toot my own horn, but to remind myself and share with you how potent the words we speak and write can be, how every day-to-day connection can nudge others for good or bad. Each one of us has the power to promote good feelings with our words.

Author Peggy Tabor Millin said it well. “We never touch people so lightly that we do not leave a trace.” So, is that light touch going to be positive or negative? Both will take the same amount of energy, but a positive touch has two pluses; you make another person feel good and you feel good right along with them. And it doesn’t have to be a major big deal. Acknowledging a person’s existence with eye contact and a simple hello could make their day and yours as well.

I recently read an article on happiness. It talked about the positive outcomes that can occur when switching from seeking happiness in that upgraded car, or house, or job to simply getting joy from “holding lives together in small, invisible ways.”

I’m the first to admit that the current state of our country has made me a bit cynical, somewhat less friendly. But a comment a friend once made makes me rethink my grumpiness. “Take one step to the left of a moment and life can be vastly different.”

I strongly believe that one moment governed by the heart and not the ego will surely lead to two. So, each day I make an attempt to take one step away from the negative. A “Good Morning” as I pass a fellow walker lightens my step and maybe theirs as well. Some pats for their dog may lead to a brief chat, possibly the only conversation they’ve had with another human all day. A thank you to the gentleman holding the door for me, a wave to a neighbor, a smile for that person I pass in the grocery aisle, a phone call to an old friend, all little tidbits of connection holding us together. And each of us can be the catalyst for that simple, meaningful bonding.

Hopefully, without being maudlin, sappy, superficial, or trite, I’ve written something meaningful. And the good news is, taking that one step to the left of a moment, connecting and leaving the slightest positive touch, adds greatly to our aging in good spirits. We are responsible for our actions. We can choose benevolence, decency, a bit of kindness over ill will and ignorance.

I have noted on more than one occasion how much I’m influenced positively by the beauty, the simplicity of Native American philosophy. Here’s a favorite piece from Creek poet Alex Posey; it offers a good start to heading into the day with courtesy and humanity. “Tis mine to be in love with life, and mine to hear the robins sing; ‘Tis mine to live apart from strife, and kneel to flowers blossoming.”

Carole Marshall is a former newspaper columnist and feature writer for American Profile magazine. Reach her at dustywriter89@gmail.com.